Friday, May 27, 2005

I Bliss Like This

He sent me the lyrics to a song, with the one statement that has stuck. "I bliss like this". So simple, yet exactly how it is. How did I get here? What did I do? Which step changed everything?

Sometimes I think of all the missed opportunities, all the times that maybe I could have, but didn't. Where was I that it was so out of reach? Why did I not get the needed pieces. Who can save me, do I need saving? There I was, just then, and here I bliss, yes I bliss like this.

Can't touch it, yet it is there. There is no way to recreate or design a plan in order to achieve. I don't grasp the workings of the machine, or the knowledge of how to fix it if it were to break down. I bliss like this.

Wonder how long it will last? Where does it dissolve into a dismal life of just living day to day, when the sky bleeds into the horizon? How do I sustain and yet not compromise it's unexpected quality? Often to only be left wondering how to get back to bliss.

Not worrying about tomorrow, or looking back to yesterday, but diving head first into the deep end of the cool water, feeling it rush over your body and shock you into total bliss.

I bliss like this.

Tuesday, May 17, 2005

More on the topic of love ...

I asked, "how do you know the difference between infatuation and love?", and this morning I have had that question on my mind non-stop.

How do you know?

Well I thought there is a simple explanation for this sort of thing, and go directly to the source, so I try to figure it out.

in·fat·u·a·tion (n.)
1. A foolish, unreasoning, or extravagant passion or attraction. See Synonyms at love.
2. An object of extravagant, short-lived passion.

love (n.)
1. A deep, tender, ineffable feeling
of affection and solicitude toward a person, such as that arising from kinship,
recognition of attractive qualities, or a sense of underlying oneness.
2. A feeling of intense desire and attraction toward a person with whom one is
disposed to make a pair; the emotion of sex and romance.
3. Sexual passion.
Sexual intercourse.
A love affair.
4. An intense emotional attachment, as for a pet or treasured object.
5. A person who is the object of deep or intense affection or attraction; beloved. Often used as a term of endearment.
6. An expression of one's affection: Send him my love.
7. A strong predilection or enthusiasm: a love of language.
The object of such an enthusiasm: The outdoors is her greatest love.
8. Love Mythology. Eros or Cupid.
9. often Love Christianity. Charity.
10. Sports. A zero score in tennis.

The analytical side of me notices a couple of things instantly. One there is only two different types of explanations of infatuation, and there are ten for love. Also I see that love is the synonym for infatuation. How interesting. Oh and there is a zero score for love when it comes to sports.

I will have to think on this one ...

A post about love ...

Can you imagine no love, pride, deep-fried chicken
Your best friend always sticking up for you even when I know you're wrong
Can you imagine no first dance, freeze dried romance five-hour phone conversation
The best soy latte that you ever had . . . and me

It is a beautiful sunny day, you have nothing to do. You are 8, and life is simple. A trip to the playground at the park, where you join the world as you know it. You don't care that your jeans aren't designer, or that you have a full schedule over the next week. You are lucky if you remembered to put socks on before your shoes. Your friends are made up of someone who was willing to give you the other half of their popsicle. Your car is your beat up bike with miles of memories on the tires. Your parents are your only boss, and they really are all knowing to you. You are 8, and life is simple.

Rushing down to the park, you see it. Oddly strange but yet totally fascinating. It is filled with other children, some laughing hysterically, and even a few crying. There are children waiting to get on the ride and some desperately trying to get off.

The merry-go-round.

Now, to my soy latte.